The Ocean

I wonder if the ebb and flow
Of the Ocean's tides
Is how she sighs and lets go
Of grave secrets she hides

She knows of ancient lores of kings
She knows of broken hearts
And everyday her waters sing
Tales men cannot tell apart

And when I cried to her one day
I knew with me she'd cried
Her solemn wave rose to the bay
And fell gently by my side

Now when I pick up seashells
I often hear strange wails
Like forgotten, arcane spells
That unfold the Ocean's tales

Silent Night

Another night falls
And as my last cigarette is put out
Another lone star shines in the sky
And a single tear escapes my eye
Another time I sleep alone
On my empty bed, cold as stone.

A song from the grave

I am but a drifting cloud in the sky
I am but a blade of grasss
I am but a teardrop in a blind man’s eye
I am but a broken piece of glass

I am but a grain of desert sand
I am but a whisper of the wind
I am but a forgotten gypsy band
I am but a loveless soul that never twinned

I am but a lonely house in the bare tree
I am but a ring in a church bell
I am but a low tide in the deep sea
I am but a leaf that withered and fell

I am but a sad song they sing along with
I am but a ghost you can’t see
I am but a lost, forlorn myth
I am but a memory.

Sunshine's song.

PS: This is for my friend's pet who I loved dearly. Sunshine. She had the loveliest voice ever. I tried to make this good but I couldn't. But I do want this to be my 50th post on here.
************************************************************************
Oh little yellow Canary
Perched on top of a mighty tree
You sing songs of melancholy
As we stop to listen.
Everyday your feathers fall
A reminder of your final call
Your sadness makes us all look small
And teardrops in our eyes glisten.


There's a distant look in your eyes
The color of the deepest skies
The window reflecting your helpless cries
But no one seems to see
For a bird's song is always careless
Free of impending worries or stress
So people laugh and say god bless!
Our chirpy little Canary.

Then one morning you were gone
And it was before long
No more was heard of the song
That still lingers in the air
But oh what I wouldn't give
To see you come back and live
And once again hold me captive
In your voice's golden lair.

When I was six

Paper planes and puddles
Tiny tents and huddles
Colorful butterflies
Syrup on cold ice.

Toy cars and dolls,
Marshmallow stalls,
A blooming bud
A splash in the mud.

Candy and cake,
A quiet lake,
Rainbow in the sky
Heaven in my eye.

Stars in the night,
Silvery light,
A bed-time tale
And dreams that entail.

When I was six,
I lived
And now I exist
I only exist.
When I was six
I believed
In beauty and bliss
When I was six...

Sing.

Every night I sleep
With pain anchored inside me
And the roots of it are deep
But sealed away so no one can see

Everyday I smile
Knowing my heart wants to cry
But I don't want to seem so fragile
To every onlooker's eye

So I swallow it all and when I feel too bad
When the tears won't stop when I'm just so sad,
When I can't bear it all, can't do anything,
I open my heart and sing
I open my heart and sing.

So I don't tell a soul about my grief
Because I know all the care is fake and brief
When life becomes a curse, when it gets maddening
I open my heart and sing
I sing.

Everywhere I go
I look at people around me, they seem happy
I wonder if it's really so
Or if they're just better at pretending

Every time I lie
On my bed, looking at the only star
I wipe a tear and heave a sigh
Wishing I could go somewhere that far

But I swallow it all and if I feel too bad
If the tears won't stop, if I'm just too sad
If I can't bear it all, can't do anything
I open my heart and sing
I open my heart and sing

Then I feel relief sweeping through me
Because a song can heal the worst misery
And then I smile, and this time genuinely
And things aren't so bad

Maybe tomorrow a good day will come
Maybe of all the sunshine, I'll get some
Maybe I'll know what it is to be glad
And things won't be so bad

And if it doesn't well

I'll swallow it all and if I feel too bad
If the tears won't stop, if I'll feel too sad
If I can't bear it all, can't do anything
I'll open my heart and sing
I'll open my heart and sing

And I won't tell a soul about my grief
Because I know all the care is fake and brief
When life becomes a curse, when it gets maddening
I'll open my heart and sing
I'll sing.

Things left unsaid.

She had once told him while they were on the phone, "I don't care if you go on and sleep with random women. Have mindless sex with them. I just don't care because I know how it gets... I am so far away and there is nothing I can do about it. But I cannot stand it if another woman occupies your heart, if your love for her is stronger than what you have for me, I will lose all purpose of life. I won't know where I'd go, what I'd so, what I'd be."

He listened, reassuring her that she was the love of his love. He told her how he could never stop thinking about her eyes that had the depth of a thousand seas. He told her how he loved her hair, especially when she let it flow freely. He told her how he wanted to marry her and none but her because she was everything in his otherwise troublesome life. He told her that he knows that she doesn't much care for children but that he'd want her to be the mother of his child if he ever did have one. He told her about how his love for her was unrequited and how he lived every second to just make the one moment of their rendezvous everything that she had hoped for. He told her that he lives to see her one day, to be able to place his hands on her shoulders, gaze into her eyes and tell her how much he loved her.

She listened, feeling reassured. Hoping that he loved her as much as he said he did because she knew that even when he said all this, she was not the person in his head. He was speaking to a lover. But he wasn't speaking to her. He was saying all the right things but they weren't directed at her.

Then one day she asked him, "You still love her don't you?"

He did her the favour of being honest. He said that he did and that she knew he did. He had told her before that he'd never be able to forget her.

"Yes, I know", she pressed, "But you would you go back to her if she called you back? Would you give me up?"

He sighed and told her that he couldn't lie. He told her how they were together for five years. How they sat next to each other at work and looked at each other all the time. He told her how they were inseparable. He told her how she had been a huge part of his life and how she took a portion of his heart all for herself. He told her she was his companion and he was hers.

She understood completely, swallowed the pain that filled her up. Her senses, her body, her mind, her brain, her soul. She was a bundle of pain. Suffering. She was loveless. She was a lot of things but she wasn't non-understanding. So she told him she understood. She told him that she thought it was wonderful that he could love someone like that. She told him that it only made him more admirable in her eyes. She wasn't lying. She meant every word she said. But she left some things unsaid.

She didn't tell him that the rest of her life she could only pretend to be happy. She didn't tell him that she craved for someone's love. She didn't tell him that she wanted someone to love her as he loved his ex. She didn't tell him that she was devastated. She didn't tell him that she wanted to cry. Because for the first time, she felt bad for herself.

Then one day, she left. She didn't say where, she didn't leave a note, she didn't give him a reason. She just disappeared like she was never there. She left no traces of her presence. Nothing for him to remember her by. Nothing to remind him of her.

Ten days later, her brother called him to tell him that he could come to the funeral if he'd like. She suffered from a vague illness for which the doctors couldn't determine the cause. That was just another thing she didn't tell him.